Look.

I'm done with your games. Absolutely fucking done. If you end it this time, that's it. No more second chances. You can't just keep breaking up with me every time you "get lonely". That isn't how this fucking works. Don't blame it on the distance, either. Ask anyone who has been in one. They can work if you want it to. Your breaking up with me almost every other week just proves that you must not want it as bad as you say you do. I'm not a game. Believe it or not, I have emotions and feelings too. You can't keep playing me like this and expect to stick around.

Here are some things I've recently learned:

• Saying "I love you" doesn't automatically fix things.
• Communication really is key. Those who don't communicate, in my opinion, drown in their sorrows. You can't get help if you're not trying to get it.
• Complaining gets you nowhere. Man up, and take control. 
• You can't expect anyone to fix you. You have to take the time to find yourself. Only you know what is wrong with you. You can't rely on others to bring you back up. That's completely up to you.
• No matter how much people suck, you can always find that one exception. Always.

Well, hi.

I got glasses over the weekend.

Do I look nifty or what?

Oddly, they haven't helped my vision that much. I always think those eye exams are just about how good you are at guessing letters. That's all I ever do. I guess that's how I've gotten away with having "perfect vision" for the past 15 years. Whatever. At least I can see a little better.

I have finals this week. I took my first 2 today. My Spanish 2 exam was so fucking hard. Seriously. I don't know if I passed. If I failed the exam, I should have a high enough grade to still pass the class. I hope so. Ugh. Theology was really fucking easy. It should raise my final grade, lol.

I have English and Algebra tomorrow. Algebra will be a walk in the park. Only because we have these awesome inventions called calculators. Saved. My. Life. English is gonna be kind of sucky, I think. Just the whole timed essay thing... ya know?

Anyways. I'm taken. Again.
Same girl.
3rd time's a charm, right? Guess we'll see.

How cute.


How.
Cute.

Uhm, so I go to a private Catholic school and everything. We wear the uniforms and on out of uniform days(which we call TAG days), we're not supposed to wear sweat pants. We get 3 TAG days during exam week. But, I mean, who wants to get all dressed up to take an exam? So, I decided that I am just wearing sweat pants tomorrow. Fuck the system!

I already gave them my money, so whatever.

I'm debating on coloring my hair.

Now for your daily Emma gpoy!

It is current;y 12:46 and I am already showered, dressed, and have my hair and make-up did. (Barely. My hair looks like poop. It always does.) This must be some kind of miracle.

Well, I don't have pants on. But who needs pants anyways? Useless.

I, apparently, am going to a home basketball game today. Just what I want! To spend my Saturday evening with everyone I deal with during the week. Yay!

I shouldn't complain. I'd probably be surfing the interwebs all night if I stayed home.

I've been singing all morning. All. Morning. First to my stove, then my computer screen, then my shower head, and now my computer screen.
Thank God nobody can hear me. Bleck.

Have you ever wondered why cats chase their tails? You'd think after a certain amount of years of having one, they'd figure out it wasn't going anywhere...

Is tail movement voluntary or involuntary?

I just gave myself something to research.

Just recently learned I will be spending my spring break in California. So begins my rigorous workouts and never ending clothes shopping in hopes I will look great for that amazing period of time. I am so fucking excited for this. 

And I leave you with the thought of me looking like a body builder.

Howdy.

So begins my 3-day weekend of studying, studying, and more studying!

This past week wasn't all that bad. I made it through. Which is good.

I got broken up with. That sucked a lot. Her reason?

The distance. I could be there in an hour if I could drive. Whatever. I'll get over it. People suck.

My hands always get really sweaty. So embarrassing. Ugh.

I have a 3 day weekend this weekend because Monday is MLK day (I always read that as MILK day. Time to drink milk!). On Tuesday, we have last minute exam review and, then, exams begin! Wednesday I get to take my Theology and Spanish finals and Thursday I have English and Math. Meh. Friday we don't have school again. Yay. And then it's finally 2nd semester.

I don't really have anything exciting to say, except that I'm about to go make a really bangin' breakfast. (Yes, I did just use the adjective "bangin".)

Uhm.

I didn't meet criteria to be admitted to the hospital. I guess it's good that I'm not crazy enough to get accepted to the looney bin, ya know.

I left school early for that today. Well, first, it started with an appointment at my (ghetto, run-down) "therapist" office. I put the quotations there because I have gotten absolutely nothing out of this woman. I had to talk to some guy who was upwards of 80 first. I guess he was like the psychiatrist or whatever. He refused to give me a prescription, lulz.  Then I talked to my therapist and then I went home. About 20 minutes later we left for the hospital. We spent 2 hours there to find out I wasn't qualified. I still don't know if that's good or bad. But the guy did recommend some new therapists and stuff. Meh.

I don't really want to go to school tomorrow. I just need to kind of catch up and think about everything, you know? Plus, I'm already excused from school for this whole week, so.

Have you ever listened to a song that just really got to you? I could list at least 20 of them. I'm listening to my iPod on shuffle and Southern Skies by Holiday Parade is playing right now.

This song. I'm feelin it. I don't know why. Just am. Ya digg.

Lolwut.

I got to watch Oprah today. Only it was a repeat and I'd seen it before so I settled for one of those crime shows on Investigation Discovery.

I wish I could spell the weird sounds I make to express myself. My favorite one sounds kind of like Narggghhhhhhhnf. 

.....

When people ask why we don't talk anymore.

It's hard to explain why I just stop talking to people. I don't want our friendship to be over.

I guess, sometimes, the friendship gets too much. Kind of like it's getting too far. Like I've let them in too far. So I just stop. I dunno.



I can't wait for Warped 2011.

Polar bears.

It kind of sucks how they're dying out, you know? It kind of seems like everything is starting to go bad. I mean, look around. All of these natural disasters. The world is falling apart. Who wants to be here anymore? It's a pretty shit place, if you ask me.